AROUND two years of age, our children start to flex their muscles of independence.  Almost every mother can remember the first time her child adamantly stomped his foot while announcing, “I can do it!”  As a mother, this can be everything from adorable to annoying, all rolled into one!

On one hand, when you watch your children begin to do things for themselves, you have a sense of pride and wonder.  The wonder comes from time flown by so fast!  How did that little dependent infant turn into a trying-to-be-competent little person?

ONCE you have a second child you have automatically enlisted yourself to serve as referee, mediator, and judge.  How you handle these roles will affect how your family functions and interacts with each other and the outside world.

Kids’ fights are inevitable.  In fact, disagreements and problems should be expected at some point in time amongst any people sharing living, working, or play space on a regular basis.  The expectant mother’s dream of constant harmony and love between her children is as unrealistic as the bride’s dream of constant marital bliss after the wedding day.  Frankly, if differences never creep up, then the people involved are probably just coexisting without caring much for one another.  This is true because we simply don’t care what someone does (so long as it doesn’t infringe on us in some way) until we care about that person. 

RECENTLY, I was scolded for exercising “bad planning” in preparing to have a second child while my first would soon be entering his “terrible twos”.

“Who says they have to be terrible?” I asked.

The person on the other end of the line gave a quick laugh and then exclaimed that I had no clue what I was getting myself into.

Well maybe I don’t have a clue, but I still stand by my question.

“Terrible twos”, “ferocious fours”, “teen drama queens”, and “impossible children eating us out of house and home”. With all the horror stories and negative nicknames that parents spread around the block, it’s no wonder that less and less people want to start families. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Instead, we can choose to stay positive and focus on the good.

PLANNING for and dreaming of the future are essential for success in this life and the next.  Identifying and setting goals, big and small, are keys to laying the foundation and mapping out the steps necessary to realizing your vision.  In fact, I’ve written about Setting Goals and Fostering Good Habits with our children.

But what happens when we reach our goals?  Are we satisfied with the results?  Do we stop and rest, dormant in our success, or are there never-ending plans and dreams that follow?  What about the journey?  Are we living in the present and enjoying the experience, or rushing through, only concerned about the future and reaching the end?